If you don’t ask, you don’t get

When it comes to asking for want we want, we are often paralysed with fear.

We have a conversation with the person in our head and decide that it’s going to be a no.

And so we don’t ask.

Like, I love the idea of action learning sets and while I know how they work in theory I’d like to talk to someone who runs them in practice. And I know someone who does but just the thought of ringing them had my heart in my throat.

I had to keep telling myself that this person is a genuine friend but the vampire voice in my head had me convinced it was going to be an awkward conversation, with them basically telling me they couldn’t help because I would end up in competition with them.

See, I had the conversation in my head with them and decided it was a no go.

Except, how can I really know that for sure? I haven’t actually spoken with them, I’ve only made up a story in my head of how I think things will go.

It’s true they may decline to help as it would put me in competition with them, and it’s also true that I’ll never know unless I ask.

If you ask it could go a multitude of ways.
If you don’t ask, it can only go one, you won’t get.

So I called him yesterday, it went to voice mail. So I sent a message and a while later he texted me back. He was at the pub with a mate. I texted him back what I wanted to ask and I’m waiting to her back.

I still don’t know which way this will go and I do know that it could only go one way if I didn’t ask.

What do you want?
Who do you need to ask?